Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Things I do while Sig Other is away...

1) I sleep on his side of the bed to feel closer to him

2) I take the cap off his cologne and sniff it before bed to feel closer to him

3) I rearrange the children's closets between the hours of 11pm and midnight in order to feel some sort of control over a life that is oft-times overwhelming

4) While rearranging the children's closets and shifting t-shirts and shorts from one room to another, I wonder why it is the housekeeper cannot discern between a tshirt meant for a 46 year old man and one meant for a 15 year old girl.

5) I stay out too late and feel the need to fill the void with social opportunities masquerading as obligation.

6) I drink too much white wine at said "obligations" and recognize that I would never even drink white wine were it not for the time spent during an evening designed to deny the void created by my sig other's absence.

7) If not out at inappropriate events drinking mediocre wine and not redistributing wrongly placed garments, I spend ludicrous amounts of time watching previously recorded mindless television and pondering the great mysteries of the world like "Why does Bethany care that Kelly doesn't like her when clearly Kelly is out of her mind?".  Or “Why does that New Jersey housewife keep all that cash on hand?”

8) And finally, when not socializing, drinking, channel surfing or organizing frenetically, I spend copious amounts of time conversing with four-legged creatures who stare at me with loving albeit vaguely confused (or perhaps vacuous) eyes.

I love my dogs.

I love my husband.

I do not like being home alone in a home designed to be filled with my people.

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