Day Two of the New Year and my beloved’s birthday! His dream of riding a century today dashed by a headcold, Sig Other is snuggled in bed with kindle and stack of tissues nearby as we share a quiet moment before the children rise to smother him with birthday hugs and kisses. In spite of congestion and disappointment, S.O. is charming and adorable as he models his new Hermes birthday hat and poses for a picture with it jauntily atop his smooth crown.
Day One of the New Year began with the news that Miss Whistle lost her father in law. We consoled her beloved Minks who sat sobbing poolside with lemonade, a deck of cards and painted fingers – a perfect picture postcard of the moment between girlhood and what lies beyond. She wondered aloud what one is supposed to do. There is no handbook for the bereaved. We talked through the many ways to look at the passing of those we love from both spiritual and scientific points of view. I’ve no idea if that talk was helpful. I sense that Child One does not know what to say or do for her friend to ease her pain. And I realize that in spite of my words and hugs, neither do I. 43 years can grant the wisdom of experience but not necessarily the magic of healing.
And so we are two days into the new year and already we’ve had grief as well as joy. In a few more days Child One and Child Two will return to school, I will go back to my office, Sig Other to his and all the while the earth continues to spin. 2010 begins. Some people will die, some will grow older with grace, some less so, our children will continue to grow and amaze us, our lives will continue to challenge and overwhelm us. And through it all, I will be ever grateful for another year with S.O.
So Happy Birthday, beloved Sig Other, my wonderful husband who gives me the strength and perspective to go through life with a full heart and a modicum of grace.